Seriously?

Today was one of "those" days. I drugged up last night and slept pretty good. Miller woke us up at 5:30, he peed in his bed. Luckily Ryan got up and cleaned him up but since he didn't feel like remaking his bed, he brought him in our room. Miller wasn't in the mood to go back to bed. After I take my pill at night, I am a dehydrated zombie in the morning. Plus I am still fighting that cough/cold thing since my Tulsa trip.

After the boys left for work/school, I went back to bed. I kept trying to figure out why I felt like I needed to get up and get moving but couldn't remember what I had planned at work. So, I rolled out of bed at 7:45 and started working. At 8:15 my reminder went off...I had a 8:30 Dr. appt. Crap, brush teeth, throw on clothes, bust out the door (made it on time).

My appt. was uneventful, just a blood draw. The nurse commented on my lack of weight gain and asked the same questions they all do about trying every trick in the book to prevent morning sickness. I got home pretty quickly and started my busy day of work. Then Ryan told me friends would be in town from MN for lunch and asked if I could meet them. Sure...quick shower, makeup, out the door again.

Lunch was good and the short time spent with friends was nice. I enhaled my lunch since I hadn't eaten well in the past couple days. It sat well until about 4pm. I had a light snack and the feeling just didn't go away. By 6pm, I was returning my lunch to the toilet. Seriously? How in the world did it not digest in 6 hours??? What irked me the most, I splashed on my brand new white t-shirt!

I have to force myself to try and eat something else but I feel like a round 2 is coming regardless. I don't want to drug up tonight (I want to watch Idol and I can't go back to bed in the morning, I have to go to the office). I am sure you are thinking who picks tv over feeding their growing child? I will tell you, the one who hasn't kept food down in 17 weeks. That's who. I keep hoping each week of my pregnancy will be "the week" it all stops. Alrighty, sorry for the complaining. It's getting old and I am sick of being sick.

Dry Night

Miller has been having dry nights for over a week now. Last night we let him sleep in his underwear and he woke up dry! I am so proud of him. I know there will be accidents but he's doing so well. We are going big bed shopping this weekend. He's actually excited for it now.

Potty Training Humor

Miller has been stellar with his potty training so I thought it was time to share a few good laughs and memories so far.

• After a rather large poop he said "I pooped Mom. It looks like a spaceship." (referencing one from Dispicable Me)
• Decision to stand up. Miller has decided that he can only pee standing up now. Lord knows he's not quite tall enough so he must stand on his stool, hold your hands, and thrust his little wang out over the toilet. He tried this morning without assistance and peed on Blue (not sure why Blue was there...). You would have thought the kid zipped himself in a zipper from the tears that ensued. Having a potty accident is the WORST thing that can happen to a little boy these days.
• Morning wake up call. Instead of the usual "It's time for Miller to wake up!" chant, we now hear "I have to pee!".

He's been potty free most mornings and even after naps. We need to transition to a big boy bed now. I am excited for this big change but I am going to miss locking him in his crib. I can only imagine the frequent visits at bedtime we are about to receive. His stall tactics care becoming quite ellaborate.

Side bar...when I cleaned his room this weekend I was thinking about how my little baby had grown up and it was time to decorate in a big boy theme. He made my entire weekend when he came in his room to get something and told me "Mom, it looks nice." I asked Ryan later and he said he didn't prompt him to say it. Even if he would have, it made my weekend. Those are the moments that erase his sassy toddler tantrums.

Busy at Work

The pace at work has picked up for me and I am actually excited about it. I have more to do with the two schools we are partnering with (getting them set up) and my peer had to take a few days off unexpectedly. So, that means I was tossed into the fire on a few things. I am actually doing pretty well on most of it but there are a few things that I am totally lost about. It drives me nuts I can't figure them out on my own and I have to ask for help.

The traveling took it's toll on me. I picked up a sore throat (which at first I thought was from puking and drier air). I hope it goes away soon. I just want to get over the hump and have some energy.

The Tulsa Experience

Tulsa Oklahoma....

The flight there: overall uneventful which is the best type of flying I like to do. TSA was hopping at the Ft. Lauderdale airport. I think it's the fastest I have ever been pushed through a line and the lines were long. The terminal was packed too. I made it to Dallas and had to do some deep breathing on the descent. I knew my morning sickness was kicking in and the bumpy landing wasn't helping. Once I landed, I scoped out my next boarding area and made a bee line for the nearest bathroom. I learned that it takes some balance to hold you hand over the little red eye to avoid an auto flush in your face and hold your hair back. I luckily only dry heaved a few times. Now my worry was what was going to happen on my next lag. Luckily, it was a short flight and I was able to hold it in.

The cab ride: hopping in a cab in Tulsa was interesting. The guy was super nice but it was a little eery. I don't think the car made it over 50mph and sounded like it was going to fall apart if we hit a bump. In addition, the steering wheel was turned a full quarter of a turn while driving straight. Oh, and the driver had to open my door because it wouldn't open from the inside. He did give me some historical info about the hotel I was staying at and a little about the town.

The hotel: fantastic. Built in the 1920's and remodeled with a very tasteful respect for the original architecture. My room was huge. The bed was comfy. And...you know I judge a hotel by it's bathroom. This hotel had a fantastic shower with real water pressure and Cottonelle toilet paper! I made it in the room and christened the toilet. I had been holding that in for hours.

The meeting/school: The University of Tulsa had a nice campus and the building we were in was nice. It was weird to be on a "real" campus again. The team we met with was super nice and I am excited to work with them.We made some good progress.

The town: umm...not much to say. The town looks like it is passed it's prime. There was a mix of old, new, and in need of some tender loving care. It felt dead and dirty. We ate at Joe Mamma's pizza last night. It was good but I wasn't feeling like eating. The walk back was a little rough but I toughed it out.

I am killing a little time before I head back to the airport for my flight home. Overall, a good trip but I can't wait until my work trips are morning sickness free. This wipes me out and I think I am getting sick. I have a cough and sore throat. I hope it's just the dry air. I am looking forward to getting back to Ryan and Miller.

Off to Tulsa

I am off to Tulsa today for work. Luckily, it's a short trip. I fly out this afternoon and come back Wednesday afternoon. I mentioned earlier my clothing dilema. As an update, I went with full blown preggo clothes (pants and shirts). I figured they were more comfortable for traveling and right now, they are new compared to the same 3 tops I have been alternating when I have to be seen in public.

What I failed to mention is the suitcase situation. When I make these short trips, I can pack really lightly BUT even with the bare minimum, it's a very tight squeeze into a backpack (and it means leaving some beloved items at home and hoping I don't spill on anything), or it's a suitcase that is too big to carry-on and not worth checking. Part of my anxiety is the carry-on situation. I already have a purse and laptop. Taking the backpack, I feel fairly confident I can wedge it into the overhead compartment. The carry-on would fit but since I travel last minute and have crappy seats, the overheads are usually full and I HATE the people who refuse to listen to the airlines when they start saying the plane is full and to check the luggage. I also hate having to lift the thing over my head and hope I don't drop it or smack anyone on the way up or down.

I looked into a smaller laptop/roller bag this weekend. They aren't condusive for a lady traveler in my opinion. There is no way you can roll up some clothes, add in some toiletries, and even consider a pair of shoes. Which...I just remembered, I forgot pjs. Dangit! With the pregnancy, that's added in a whole new level of snacks. I have to pack some food for in the hotel room.

I may go switch from my backpack to the carry-on and check a bag. This trying to be a light packer is making me tired.

Trains, Ponies, and Yard Work

Miller woke up Saturday asking to finish watching the pirate movie (Pirates of the Caribbean) and Ryan asked "Did you forget about ponies and choo choo trains?" A quick "Oh yeah, trains and pony rides!" confirmed the little one was focused on the wrong thing and then itching to go. So, we packed up and headed to a local park that offers train rides and pony rides. It was our first time but we met Rylee and Norah there who had become pros at the process. Needless to say, I overheard Miller say to Ryan "Let's go faster!" while on the horse. I don't think Charlie had a faster speed than slow. Here are a few pics:

After the fun we stopped at Panera for lunch. Then Miller and I opted for a nap. Ryan played with his race car but then started some more landscaping, or should I say clearing?



Confession

I spoke a little too soon about feeling better. Yesterday was an icky day. I thought I would fight it and I did until 7pm. Then Ryan convinced me to take a pill. My biggest concern was I know by the 1.5 hour mark after taking it, I am lights out, ready for bed. Idol wouldn't be over until 9. I struggled to stay awake and I somehow was able to see/hear who was kicked off. I honestly think I was out within miliseconds of them announcing it because Ryan woke me up before the credits were rolling.

Yes, I am obsessed with Idol this year. I fully admit it. The judges are better, there isn't any Seacrest/Cowell bantering going on, the music catalog is so much better, and the contenstants are not only interesting and have personality, but they are truly unique and gifted performers.

A friend posted her guilty pleasure in watching reality tv shows. I admit, I am a sucker for some reality tv. I feel like there is too much of it but at least there is a show or two for every taste out there. Who doesn't love a Kardashian marathon?

Week 15

I broke down and wore my "early" preggo pants to work today. They aren't real maternity pants with an elastic band but are normal pants with some extra stretch on the sides. If my blog accurately depicted things with Miller, this is the same time I wore preggo shirts over my pants with hair ties holding them together. Sounds like it's an even match so far.

Next week I have to travel for work. I am already stressing over what to wear. I have an outfit for the day we meet with our client but for my two travel days...I really don't have much. I can't decide if I should break out the full time maternity clothes or still try to make an outfit out of normal clothes. I am going for comfort so I have a feeling that will determine what I wear more than anything else.

This is the part of pregnancy that is annoying. You start to show but not enough that you have a cute bump. It's more like an unflattering bloatedness topped with things shifting. Oh well, I am sure a week or two from now I will skip the cute bump and go straight to preggo whale.(at least I have clothes for that!)

One last note. In general, I am starting to feel better. I think the drugs got me through the roughest patch and I was able to get some nourishment and rest in. I still have boughts with nausea daily but nothing like 1-2 weeks ago. I hope this is a sign that I am headed into the trimester of feeling good.

Working From Home VS The Office

I recently changed jobs (well, it's been almost 7 or 8 weeks) and really do like my new position, team, and responsibilities. I have a lot to learn and am far from proficient but I am getting there. I also love the change of pace. I have had to relearn how to work under much less pressure and few to no intetruptions. Yes, you read that correctly. It is amazing how after being intertuption driven and having competing priorities for years my brain has had to relearn how to concentrate and focus.

One of the perks of the new job is that I can work from home 3 days a week. Without any distraction or office chatter, I am pretty much struggling to pace my work so I don't get it all done right away. I know my workload is light and it will increase but I seriously can bust through so many things without any intertuptions in a fraction of a work day. This probably sounds like a good problem to have. The problem with it for me is I find myself struggling to stay occupied and wishing I had someone to talk to.

Then I go in the office 2 days a week and I am amazed at how little I get done. It's great to talk to people (socially and work related) but what a time suck. I feel like I am there but hardly accomplishing any "tasks."

I have spoken to a few other people who have similar work situations and they agreed that the hardest mindset change is that when you are in the office, your networking, meeting, face to face time "is your work." It's a good way to look at it and one day I will get there.

The Streak Continues

Miller has been doing an excellent job with his potty training. He is averaging maybe one accident a day which is pretty darn good if you ask me. We have even tested him out in public (dinner, race track, friend's house, etc.).

Yesterday he stopped playing in the pool to tell me he had to go the bathroom. I rushed him inside (didn't have a towel). I got him stripped down with a puddle of pool water at his feet. He did his business like a big boy. As we were cleaning him up, we had him face the toilet to get a good wipe. The puddle on the floor was too much and his feet went out behind him and he smacked his chin on the toilet seat. Ryan and I thought for sure he bit his tongue and there would be blood. Luckily, just a scratch on his throat and a few tears. The pain was quickly forgotten once back outside to play. What a trooper.

He enjoyed playing in with his friends and was a wild man for hours. He ate a super sized supper and topped it off with the tiniest ice cream cone I have ever seen. So cute. He managed to stay awake on the ride home and went to bed fairly quickly.

At 3:30 we awoke to him screaming. Thinking it was a nightmare, Ryan went in to calm him down. Nope, it was our first puke incident. That poor kid puked on everything! Ryan cleaned Miller up while I cleaned up the bed and tossed all his pillows and stuffed animals in the wash. He was very upset he was in trouble and scared about the whole ordeal. We got him back in a clean bed with some other stuffed animals and back to sleep he went. He was fever free last night/this morning. I don't think it was a concussion from his fall. I think it was too much fun in the sun and food (and pool water-kiddie splash pool-no chlorine). I am sure he will tell some wild stories at daycare today. I wonder which parts will be true.

Potty Training Celebration

Miller has had a fantastic week at school and home with minimal accidents. Friday he not only accomplished pooping in the potty once, but he did it twice at school and once at home! I think he had been holding it for a couple days. LOL! To celebrate, we took a trip to Toys R Us. It was his first time there. He was in heaven. This is what he settled on.

I didn't even ask him to pose that way. He was so happy and couldn't wait to take the picture so we could open it up.

Tsunami

Taking a break from pregnancy and potty training updates...a giant tsunami hit Japan today. There are reports that it will affect Hawaii and possibly the west coast of the US. I don't know what it is about natural disasters but they can lure me into a comatose state waiting and watching for updates. I feel very lucky we are not involved or know of any friends or family that will be directly affected. My heart goes out to the people affected.  I couldn't imagine having that type of destruction wipe out our house, belongings, work, safety, etc.

The irony (if you can call it that) was that yesterday south FL had a storm front move through. It resulted in 55 and 60+ mph winds, uprooted trees, and two tornado touchdowns. As the storm was ramping up and I was safe and dry inside, I thought about how the newscasters must be ramping up for their normal doom and gloom that comes with hurricane season. I actually turned on the news last night (rare occurance at our house around supper time) and watched the updates. Then it quickly reminded me why I normally avoid the news (so overly dramatic).

This morning, I went to look up an address on the computer and saw the bold red banner announcing the tsunami. I instantly scanned the info mainly because Ryan mentioned a co-worker/friend being in China for work. Since he's not always the best with geography, I quickly quizzed him to make sure she wasn't in Japan. Since I read that first article, I have watched the local news, read a few articles online, and watched a few broadcasts online. I feel compelled to see what is going on. Now compare this to the trouble in the middle east...that's about all I know. There is trouble in the middle east and the only impact I am aware of is rising gas prices and falling stocks (thank you news today). Something tells me I have my priorities backwards and should be actively learning about what else is going on in the world besides natural disasters, Charlie Sheen, and Lilo.

Potty Training

Miller is doing pretty good with his potty training. He came home from school yesterday with a positive report. I met him at the door and was excited to praise him. Ryan and I quickly discovered that having someone ask you every 15 minutes if you have to go potty must have worn the little guy out. He was crabby and over being asked the question. In fact, he even said "quit asking me questions."

Within a few minutes he asked if he could put on a diaper. We knew it meant he wanted to poo but didn't want to go it in the potty. We said ok and told him to tell us. We could still try. Well, within 5 minutes of putting the diaper on, he pooped. I think he had had enough. *I did find out from a lady at work that her son did the same thing! She thought he was weird and was happy to hear another kid asks for a diaper to poop in.

Today, in my spacecadet brain, I forgot to put a pullup on Miller before I sent him to school. He was in a pair of underwear. I am secretly hoping one poop in his underwear will get him over the hurdle. It may backfire on me but who knows. I am excited to hear today's report. Hopefully he has another successful day. Then we can move on to getting him big boy furnture and the changing station can move to the baby room. Yay!

I am going to miss my Miller baby but it is so fun having him be a kid. Now, if only this little alien inside of me would finish brewing, birth itself, and fast forward to a 3 year old I would be in heaven. Somehow, I just prefer interacting with a little human over the blob that leaks from both ends. I am so maternal :) Remind me of this post when I whine that my baby is no longer a baby.

Drug Update and Miller Update

Today is a two for one read.

I took my anti-nauseaus pill last night at 6pm. It definitely helped ease the nauseous feeling. The side effect of drowsiness is one to not be exagerated. By 7:45, I was starting to feel super tired. I felt like I was drunk talking by 8 and by 8:30, I couldn't fight the beast. I was knocked out. Granted, it was the best darn sleep I have had in months. Verdict, I think I will try them for a few days. I will suffer through the afternoons, take them close to supper time and crash early. Hopefully after a few good nights of this I will feel ok without them. Today's goal is rehydrating. I am already on my 3rd glass of water and it's not even 9am. :)

In Miller news, he has decided underwear are cool. He's doing pretty well with peeing in the potty but poop is another story. We struck a deal with him and daycare that he has to wear his pullups until he poops. Once he poops (which we are encouraging is a pottty thing, not ok to do in diapers) he's free to wear his underwear. He gets very upset if he has an accident so maybe this will be the changing point where he wants to be potty trained.

This is the phase that reminds me why I don't want a puppy. No one likes cleaning up pee, no matter how cute the little critter is.

Drugs

I decided to ask for help regarding my nausea at today's doctor appointment. I have been debating on this topic for weeks but after a very upsetting "run from the dinner table" episode last evening which then left me feeling so drained and depressed that all I wanted to do was go to bed so I could escape the feeling and hunger, enough was enough. I told my doctor as the tears welled up and she said my goodness, of course you can have a presciption. The side effect is drowsiness. Hell, I try to go to bed as early as possible to avoid the icky feeling. So if I have to continue with an 8pm bedtime, so be it. As long as I can function and stay hydrated, it works for me.

I left the dr.'s appointment feeling relieved. I don't want to have to take the pills but if I can get a few days of fuel in me and start to feel better, that's what I am going to have to do. I stopped at Walgreen's on the way to work to get my presciption filled. I waited forever for the pharmacist to wait on me. He needed a bell. I said "good morning, excuse me, hello" multiple times but was not heard or acknowledged. After a good 5-10 minute wait, he finally waited on me. I was going to wait for him to fill it but he said it would be 20-30 minutes. I opted to leave since he now had 3 people behind me in line. I wasn't a mile down the road when he texted it was filled. I didn't turn around. I just knew that it would be another long wait to get it and pay for it. I will stop on my way home.

Still feeling good about my decision I decided I was going to try to get some food in me. Breakfast is normally a small bowl of cereal and it had worn off while at the doctor's office. I thought an OJ from McD's and a sandwich sounded kinda good. I swung through and decided I really wanted a sausage, egg, cheese BAGEL. Normally I get the english muffin but the bagel sounded extremely good. The stars were aligned against me. I ordered and the guy asked me to repeat it again and again. He asked me if it was a #4 (biscuit) and I said no. I then thought telling him a #13 with sausage instead of bacon would make it easier on him. He didn't get it and repeated back an order that had pancakes in it. I said it one more time. He still didn't get it. Finally I said something along the lines of I will just get a #2 with OJ, no coffee. He repeated it back to me and asked which size coffe I wanted. ARGH! I ended up with a sausage, egg, and cheese english muffin and an OJ. It worked but I really wanted the bagel. The kicker is I have ordered this from that McD's before. It wasn't something they don't offer.

Once I got to work, I received a very positive note one of my co-workers father made it through brain surgery and was doing well. Then I had a co-worker bring me some soup to try. Those two things really put my frustration over a stupid McD's order back in perspective. I have so much to be thankful for. Hopefully I am singing the praises of my new drug and getting the energy and attitude back that has been missing for too long.

Reviving the Blog?

Lately I have been contemplating reviving my blog. Main reason, we are expecting baby #2 and honestly, without my blog entries from Miller's pregnancy and birth, I probably wouldn't have much of a memory at all.

Here it goes...pregnancy round 2.

I distinctly remember how I hated being pregnant very early on. Morning sickness was not kind to me most mornings and for a constant 20 weeks. There was little escape of uncomfort until I received a prescription to keep my heartburn at bay. This time, I vowed I knew it was going to suck and that I can do it. I was braced with first hand knowledge of how to trick my body out of it's nauseous state; small frequent meals, avoiding certain foods that seemed to disturb my normally solid innerds and consuming those that were supposedly better for me.

Mother nature didn't like this game I came prepared for. Instead of morning sickness that lingered all day, she decided to hit me with morning sickness that lingered all day but ruptured into a fullout battle every afternoon/evening. I am knocking on wood I do not have to worship public porcelain throwns or join the mile high puke club. Tomorrow I have my 14 week checkup and plan to sucumb to my pride and ask for drugs.

I know this is the weak approach but I have been feeling severly run down and plain old cranky. I don't want to continue feeling this way for any longer. I hope she can prescribe something and it works. I just want some of the old me back.

On a more positive note, I am much less anxious this time around. I am still following what the baby is doing each week but honestly, I have the been there done that attitude. I hope that's a good thing. I am seeing it that way.

Since this is getting long and is my attempt to regain my desire to blog, I will save a few ideas and reflections for later this week. :)