The Stars Are Out of Alignment

Something in the Cosmos is off and I can't quite figure it out. I have been trying to stay optimistic and positive about things going on in my life and for some reason, shit just keeps piling on. Work sucks but I am not even going to go down that road. All I can say no good deed goes unpunished. Seriously, how can everything be wrong all the time? The car situation was crap but at least Ryan's parents were here to help out. Today, I got in my car and AC was hit and miss. If that is also going to go, I am going to take the first chance it works to turn it in for a new car. I refuse to sink in more money at this point.

I thought I was being a good mom/wife today. I skipped out of work a few minutes to 5 so I could call in for my last meeting while driving. I got home early and Ryan says "You must not have gotten my message." Umm...no I didn't. I needed to turn my butt around and head back towards work to pick up formula and a few other items (Barack was around the corner and I was not going anywhere near that pep rally). When I finally got to Babies R Us, I had to wait in line for 20 minutes! I called Ryan and he said skip the other errands and get home. Then we sat down for dinner and Jazzy had peed on my cushion again. So, I am washing another load of laundry tonight.

I am mentally and physically exhausted. I am thinking about taking a day off in a week or two for some sanity. The problem is I am so busy at work that it just makes that part of my life worse. I guess I have to keep thanking the miss aligned stars for a healthy baby who eats and sleeps pretty regularily and a gimpy husband who is trying to heal too fast.

Since I still have a few more chores to do, I think I am going to stay up a little longer and watch a tv show just to help numb my mind. I should be reading business requirements or drafting some use cases but I figure I am far enough behind, that it won't make that big of a difference. If I were to work for several more hours I would see the benefit and that's not going to happen tonight.

Car Trouble

When Ryan went hunting I decided to drop my car off at the dealer. It had not started for me a couple times and I was worried about getting stranded with Miller. They had it for a week and couldn't find anything wrong with it. It still cost me several hundred dollars to have a few maintenance items done but I figured I would make those and drive it for another 6 months to a year. Then, I decided if I am going to drive it that long, I should put some new tires on it. Then today, just when I thought it was behaving, I got the call.

Ryan's parents, brother, and Miller had met Ryan for lunch and the car wouldn't start. Talk about a pain the butt and the pocket book. I felt bad that it happened to them but at the same time, we were lucky they were around to help out. Ryan called a tow truck for me and I left work to pick everyone up. The car is fixed and hopefully nothing else goes wrong with it. I know it still is cheaper to do the repairs than to start having car payments but man...talk about frustrating. Now the itch for a new car is really underway.

Superwife

I have elevated my supermom status to include superwife. Ryan had his knee surgery yesterday and I remained pretty darn calm throughout the day. The doctor said he's going to be on crutches for a month. That pretty much set me in a tizzy. I knew it would be at least a week or two but four weeks! Yikes.

So, we went to bed last night and I couldn't fall asleep. I had 3 Dt. Cokes yesterday, Ryan's knee machine was making noise, and between Ryan and Annie I had no room on the bed. I was thinking about how to get him and Miller to work every morning, picking them up, Ryan having to hobble through the halls at work (I swear it's a half mile from the door to their office), etc. I toughed it out until 1 when his snoring woke me back up. Then I tossed and turned until 2 something and headed to the couch. At 4 I got up and refilled his machine with ice and more water. I was going to do it at 2 but I was so tired I just didn't have it in me. Then I was worried about not waking up for work so I tossed some more and woke up 10 minutes before my alarm. 5:30 rolled around way too quickly and I think I am sleep typing. I actually looked forward to my drive to work because I could "relax."

Work is crazy busy and I just want to take a nap. Something tells me it is going to be a rough day. Thank goodness it's Friday. I have jeans, t-shirt, sweatshirt, and tennis shoes on. At least the comfortable clothing option is on my side today.

Optimism

When I returned to work after maternity leave, I was optimistic things would be better than before I left. Nope. Each week progressively gets worse and I keep thinking it has to get better. Nope. I am seriously wondering how to continue to enjoy work and not get beaten down by the insanity. I have been working 7:15 to 5:30 or 6 most days. I work through my lunch hour and sometimes put in a couple more hours at home. I can't get out from underneath some stuff. I just keep thinking if I could get a couple items where I want them to be, maybe I will feel better. I think this would require working a full weekend or more and I honestly don't have it in me.

Positive thinking isn't working. Complaining isn't working. My proactive plans aren't working. Life's a bitch.

Chores

So far out of the 7 items on my chore list I accomplished 4.5...I took out the garbage (cleaned out fridge and cat litter), cleaned house (floors including cleaning grout in the bathroom), Miller's laundry, picked up my car, bought some groceries to get me through tomorrow, and returned my halloween costumes. I have not successfully napped, bought a weeks worth of groceries, or finished laundry.

Miller is taking a nap so I might go watch a little tv before we head over to Jess and Jerry's for a delightful meal. I want to take the pack n play but have never set it up myself. Looks like Miller will have to sleep on the floor until I am ready to leave. He's starting to roll so the middle of the bed is no longer an option.

Scooter and Annie better beware, he will be mobile before too long. Their worlds are going to flip upside down again.

Goodbye Abby Lockhart

I have faithfully watched ER for the past 14 years. This is the final season and they are slowly writing off all of the characters. Character Abby Lockhart has been on for the past 10 years and I have to say, I have seen her go through hell with her love life, manic mother, alcoholism, marriage, pregnancy, nurse to doctor, etc. I can't believe she is gone and the show is ending. There are only a few characters left that have been on for ages. It's pretty cool how they are tying things up and I won't give away anything if you haven't watched it yet.

Needless to say, I will have to find a new Thursday night addiction for the next decade to follow. Any suggestions? Maybe this time around I will pick a comedy rather than a drama that makes me cry every week and plays with my emotions.

Supermom Secret Ingredient Discovered

With Ryan being gone now for over a week, I have fully discovered the supermom secret ingredient for success. Caffeine! Yes, it is a glorious thing but I have yet to resort to coffee. I have lived on about 5 hours of sleep each night for the past week, worked a full day, done the mommy thing, worked some more, and had a little bit of a social life. I can't wait for the weekend to come because I fully intend to get a nap or two in.

Miller has been a good boy. His newest milestone this week was rolling onto his stomach in his crib and staying asleep. Last week when he did that he woke up and I had to go and flip him back over. He went down last night on his back with his head on the window end of the room. This morning, he had his head facing the opposite side of the room (closet) and was on his stomach. What an amazing little dude.

Goals for the next couple days:
1) Take out garbage
2) Clean house
3) Laundry
4) Pick up my car from the dealer
5) Groceries???
6) Return halloween costumes
7) Nap

I think I can manage most of those.

More Miller Stats

Miller had his 4 month check up today. Here are the stats:

27 3/4 inches
17 lbs 6 oz

The boy is off the charts. He has cold #2 but got his shots beside the fact today. He did NOT do well. This is the first time he cried (a lot) and made me feel super bad. Plus I was lectured by the lady at the desk because I didn't know to give her some stuff prior to our visit rather than afterwards. Ryan wasn't along, the wait was 10 times as long as usual, and Miller was far from happy AND we got rained on on the way to the car. The good news is besides his growth, he seems to be developing/hitting his milestones early.

This weekend Grandma and Grandpa Sladky were here. They really enjoyed playing with him. He has become such an animated happy boy it brings me to tears. He is so good. He was struggling with a cold but overall he rocked. We had our first professional pictures taken which were adorable. I need to scan them and post them.

Miller also learned how to roll this past week. The bummer is he rolls in his sleep and then freaks himself out. This does not make for a happy mom that has to get up, calm him down and then go back to bed.

Ryan is off killing animals so he is missing out on the excitement BUT he will owe mom some good quiet/free time once he gets back. ;)

Today's Quote

“Whenever I’m about to do something, I think, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ And if they would, I do NOT do that thing.” -Dwight (from The Office tv show)

Exercising Attempt #?

I am back on the exercise wagon. We borrowed a friend's Wii Fit this weekend and I really liked it. I want to get one of my own. I know you probably wonder how a video game counts as exercise but for over a half hour, I am actively working muscles I normally don't move. Plus, I have always avoided Yoga because I am so inflexible and know I would look like a fool in class. The Wii Fit makes you learn to balance correctly and hold the poses the right way. If I didn't have that telling me I was off center, I wouldn't be gaining any benefits. It is a new way to challenge myself but definitely is not the end all be all to exercise.

In fact, Annie has been acting up lately due to her finally figuring out Miller is here to stay. She is cooped up all day so Ryan and I figured one of us could Wii Fit while the other took her for a walk. I think this might work for the time being. We both used the Wii over the weekend and yesterday I used it while Ryan walked Annie. Tonight I took her on the walk but we had to return the game to it's owner so no workout for Ryan. Of course we are looking to buy one and every store is sold out. Go figure!

I have no idea how Crystal can hula hoop for a half hour straight. I did 6 minutes last night and thought my hips were going to fall off. Anyhow, it's a step towards a real workout and I definitely can feel things being challenged. This couch potato has a long way to go. Wish me luck.

The Weaker Sex

Men. The weaker sex.

Women. The ultimate multitasking machines on earth and stronger than man.

You are probably wondering what led to this post. Let's see...women give birth and live through an unimaginable pain. Women live on little to no sleep. Women get colds, function on about 5 hours of sleep for a week, work 50+ hours a week, take care of a baby (with the help of men), and accomplish household chores. (some women even added in exercise this week)

Men...get a sore throat and go to bed before 8pm on the first night. Enough said.

Rolly Poly

Miller officially rolled over on his own today several times! He's been working his way up to it but this time it was on the floor, unassisted in any way. I know this is a milestone that I will soon regret as he becomes more mobile but man, it sure was cool!

We were a busy crew today. Ryan was off running errands this morning before 8am. Then we went to Bass Pro Shops today for some shopping (Ryan needed a few things for duck hunting). Miller was oohed and ahhed after by the ladies working. It was kinda funny. I must have a giant baby because they all ask how old he is, I tell them and then they are like "Wow! He's advanced and acts like ." I even had a few other moms tell me the same thing. Hmmm...do I have an overly large baby?

We are trying to make some travel arrangements to go to MN in the month of December. I said once we make those plans, we are going back to Bass Pro to purchase some adorable outfits that are warmer for Miller. I had to chuckle over the cutest camo hat and mittens and pj's that had antlers and a white tail (deer). I am going to solicit my friends who have had kids to maybe offer a winter coat or something. I can't spend $90 on a Columbia jacket the kid will wear for a couple days.

Other than that, we had lunch there and then headed home to do some house cleaning and started some laundry. With me not doing a few loads during the week, it sure makes for a long process on the weekends. Jazzy is back to her antics with peeing on the seat cushions in the kitchen. Not sure what got into her this week. I am actively searching for new ones but washed them up-good as new.

Time to sit back and enjoy the few more minutes of quiet before our night time routine begins. I am glad Miller settled into a routine. It was tough when I was home with him because we hadn't quite established it but now he is almost like clockwork. He's a fabulous baby and I hope I didn't jinx us with that statement!

Head Cold of the Century

I figured after I gave birth, no pain would ever annoy me or give me a reason to complain. I take that thought back. I have the worst head cold I have ever experienced. I have felt it coming on with the tell tale signs-ear ache, sore throat, cough, and now full blown snot monster. I swear I have a pulse in my eyes, cheeks, nose, etc. I stopped and bought some suedafed this morning at the gas station. I used to double my dosage when I was younger but I followed the directions and only took one stupid pill. I felt all hopped up and off kilter. What the heck?!?! Dr. Ryan said it's probably because my body has gone for over a year without even a tylenol in me.

I must have looked quite attractive today too because I was repeatedly asked if I was ok and if I was crying. My eyes were teary all day and my voice was in and out. I wanted to leave work early but I had one major item to do before the day was over and it got pushed back later and later in the day. All of a sudden it was 6pm!

So, I was pretty lame tonight. Got home, fed Miller, ate some dinner, gave him a bath, finished the remainder of his bottle (sometimes he is too distracted to eat), read him a book, and then he went to bed and I watched a movie. Drop Dead Gorgeous. Funny movie if you are from MN yet slightly disturbing how real the comedy was. Time for bed. I get to sleep in until at least 6am tomorrow!