TMI Post About Breast Feeding

The subject is a warning for those that don't want to hear about boobs that are about to explode. You have been warned there is probably too much information in this post.

As some have noted, I quit breastfeeding/pumping on Saturday. It has been a few days of mixed emotions and physical pain. I never planned on breastfeeding much after I returned to work. I had been weaning Miller and spreading out my pumping sessions so the transition was less painful on me. He's been eating half and half (formula and breastmilk) for a little over a month. He has always fed from a bottle so he didn't have much adjusting to do-thank god!

The decision to quit was semi-selfish. Heck, it was totally selfish. I am sick of pumping! It is very time consuming and hard to manage to do at work. I got sick of watching Ryan feed Miller and having to watch from the sidelines while I pumped. I also was sick of monitoring what I ate and drank. I wanted my Dt. Cokes and other aspartame loaded foods back.

Since I had known this was going to happen when I went back to work, I was surprised by how guilty I feel. I have a supply in the freezer that will get him through close to another month. By then, he should be mixing some rice cereal into his diet and shortly thereafter, introduced to baby food (solids). The sane part of me knows he received the good benefits of breastmilk when he needed it most. He is healthy. I shouldn't feel bad. The crazy part of me feels guilty that I should have stuck it out for another month or two. What kind of mom just quits producing food for her son because it is a pain in the ass? Obviously, a self absorbed person like me.

So, here's the TMI portion. Stopping pumping hurts. Labor makes you stronger but it is still uncomfortable. I feel like if you touch me, I will pop and actually would appreciate that release. My already gigantic boobs are even bigger. I have heard all the advice: cabbage leaves, ace bandages, small manual releases to relieve pressure, etc. If I were sitting at home all day, I would try all these but the reality is I have to work and suffer through this. I had hoped it would be a couple day adventure but nope, it supposedly lasts for close to a week or more. Nice.

Now after all this whining, I still think I would do this with kid number two. Pregnancy and motherhood truly mess with your brain. No sane person would consider this. The body is an amazing thing.